I was thinking about some of the little things that keep romance alive regardless of how long you’ve been with someone, how old you get or how big your thighs might be. I’m writing this for women but the advice goes both ways (except maybe the part about the lip gloss). I’m not trapped in 1950 assuming that only the woman is responsible for pleasing her man. If you’ve regularly read my posts, you’ll recall that I’ve written a few aimed at men and how they can up their game. Keeping each other happy is of the utmost importance when it comes to the longevity of any relationship.When people are together for a while, they sometimes forget to keep up with all of those tiny acts of love that had your motor running hot when you were first together. Here’s a list of 5 to work on. I guarantee they’ll bring back that lovin’ feeling…
1. Eye Contact – When is the last time that you gazed into your fella’s baby blues? I mean really gazed into them, noticing the little flecks of colour within, the size of his pupils, his eyelashes lowering as he blinks? Often it’s easy for people to go days or weeks even without really looking at each other. We might be talking with each other as we sit side by side in the car or on the couch, or while we are cooking and doing other important tasks, but we don’t actually look at each other. So take some time this week to sit facing each other while you eat a meal or have a coffee or just have a talk. Put away the handheld screens and look at each other. Even if it’s just for a minute each day, you’ll notice that it makes a huge difference in how close you feel.
2. Touching – Take some time to flirt with your body. Give him a big hug or a lingering kiss before he heads out the door (or when he comes in), touch his arm, lazily run your fingertips over the back of his hand, etc. Touching feels good for everyone, men included. This is just one little way you can make him feel adored.
3. Smile – Remember when you first were together and you’re face used to light up when you saw him? Yet, do that. Smile at him often as you go through your day or evening together, especially when you greet each other. Give him that look that shows him he’s the only one for you.
4. Play up your (ahem) Assets – Ditch the flannel pajama bottoms (I’m talking to myself here) and put on something a little more flattering. You can still be comfortable (yoga pants, anyone?) but try to show off what you’ve got when you are hanging around the house. Throw on a little lip gloss when you think of it, maybe that perfume that drives him wild, then make sure you need to accidentally-on-purpose reach something on the other side of him so he gets a nice whiff.
5. Lean In and / or Tilt Your Head – Both of these subtle forms of body language show that we are interested in the other person and are engaged in what they are saying. Really focus on him and not what else is happening in the room (unless, of course, you have a child who is playing with matches or there is some other urgent issue to deal with). Listen to him the same way you want to be listened to.
Now, there’s your spice-things-up homework for the next couple of weeks! I hope it is helpful and that you’ll have fun with it!